GRIEF

You don’t write about losing a baby

unless you’ve lost a baby. And if you’ve

lost a baby, you know that you don’t want

to write about the thick grief, you don’t wish to think

about the trauma, to feel the hurt, or to relive

the moments any more. But mourning demands

to be felt. And healing is never linear.

These pains keep arriving in oscilating rhythms,

again and again and again and again and again…again.

This universe does not care.

That god, does not empathize either.

Otherwise, the baby would have stayed like other babies

Due in September like fruits from our favourite tree.

We waited for Spring with eyes full of sunflower seeds,

our southerly sun baking impatiently for

who was to bloom brightly, blossoming

with life. Our first child that would not be.

Who quietly as she came on that Monday morning, sneaked out